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The fake shopping mall

I’m the Medley Centre, Damnit! is arguably Rochester’s funniest Twitter account. And no, we aren’t revealing who’s behind it.

Are you from Rochester? If so, where?


@MedleyCentre: I’m actually from Rochester, Minnesota. Moved to Rochester, Texas, and then spent a year abroad in England in Rochester, Kent. It’s kind of funny how that has worked out. I won’t tell you what town I am from but I will tell you it has a Wegmans. That should narrow it down for you.





What has been your relationship with the Medley Centre?


@MedleyCentre: I shopped there once, twenty years ago. I enjoyed Steve but found Barry pretentious and foul smelling. 





What is your favorite embarrassing thing for our city in recent years?


@MedleyCentre: Just one? I guess that whole photonics thing hasn’t really paid dividends yet. I’m not sure what will come first, they add the 600 jobs or I understand what photonics is. Probably neither. 





What are the best and worst times you’ve had at a local festival?


@MedleyCentre: Well, the worst time was this year when I drank all those White Claws at the Park Ave fest and started that fight. Wow … that was embarrassing!

I’d say the best time was this year’s Park Ave fest when I got into all those White Claws and started that fight. 





The Inner Loop Blog seems to trend more every day. Is there room for more than one self-deprecating Roc-based social media parody account?


@MedleyCentre: Someday we will tell our grandchildren that we lived in the golden age of self-deprecating, Roc-based social media parody accounts. We will also tell them we lived in the golden age of cereal bars and axe throwing. I’m guessing our grandchildren won’t be overly impressed.





What would be the thesis of your manifesto? 


@MedleyCentre: I’d like to think the Medley Centre Twitter account is a love letter to Rochester, NY. If the letter was written in crayon. With lots of spelling errors. And was sent from someone who didn’t really love you. I mean they LOVE you. but they are not IN LOVE with you. 

I’d like to think this account speaks for, and directly to, those without a voice in this community. The Geneseo fountain bear who keeps getting smashed into, for example. I’m like the Lorax. but I speak for statues in roundabouts. 

I’d like to think the Medley Centre twitter account has created a bit of an oasis of tranquility and acceptance on an otherwise toxic website. I’d like to THINK that, but considering I once spent a week Photoshopping a local politician’s hair piece on various objects—both animate and inanimate—I’m not sure that’s the case. I talk a good game when it comes to civility, but I’d do pretty much anything for 100 likes.

I’d like to think the Medley Centre has provided an occasional polite chuckle, guffaw or—at the very least—that quick, snort of air that we push through our nose to express mild amusement after reading something mildly amusing. I try and set the bar nice and high for myself! You should too, folks.





What is your biggest complaint about kids these days?


@MedleyCentre: They track mud in the house and won’t put away a damn dish. Would it kill them to put away a damn dish????





If you had the opportunity (and ability) to create your own Wall Therapy, where and what would it be?


@MedleyCentre: I’d paint a big fake tunnel on the side of Medley Centre and see if I could trick Wile E. Coyote into running into it. Or paint two rats having sex. That might look nice downtown. We should do that.





What’s the best coffee in the (585)? (Or tea, or kombucha, or beer, or whatever gets you out of bed each morning …)


@MedleyCentre: What gets me out of bed in the morning is that the sky’s the limit for this city and this account. I can envision a day when I can get out of bed, visit my favorite cereal bar, go get all boozed up, and chuck a few axes at things and Photoshop a wig on a statue of a bear. 

Some people call me a dreamer.

But I’m not the only one.

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