Children’s charity birthday parties is an emerging concept that encourages youngsters to use their sought-after celebrations in a philanthropic way. And many families are seizing the day.
When Tracy Crowley and Ingrid Yerger’s two 10-year-old sons and fellow schoolmates Cayden and Bo wanted to share their shindig, their mothers suggested they have a Hawaiian-themed party with a focus on presence, not presents. “We both knew what the boys really wanted was to have fun with their friends, and they didn’t need any more toys. So we suggested they have a party and donate their gifts to a children’s hospital,” says Cayden’s mother Tracy. “It went with the whole party theme — kids giving kids presents — and would involve sharing with those less fortunate. We threw the idea out to the boys but said, ‘It’s up to you.’ They thought it was a great idea.” Cayden and Bo’s bash was bountiful, with swimming, an inflatable moon bounce, a water ice truck and fifty children who donated a deluge of dolls, art activities, building blocks and books.
“After the party the boys sorted the presents by gender then they each chose one gift they wanted. The rest were bagged and taken to the hospital,” says Tracy. “That’s when it really hit home. A hospital representative met us at the front door, shook Cayden and Bo’s hands and thanked them profusely. Although we couldn’t give the presents directly to the patients, she talked with the boys about how their giving would help and took them on a tour of the facility.”
For the Morris family, benevolent birthdays are a burgeoning tradition. When their oldest son Jake celebrated his seventh last year, he had a baseball-themed blow out and asked attendees to donate children’s essentials to a local nonprofit organization. His younger brother Cole latched onto the idea. “During that time Jake explained to Cole why he chose to do this and Cole said he wanted to have a charitable party too. So when his birthday rolled around we rehashed the idea to make sure he was still up for it then decided on a tie-dye t-shirt party,” says Elisa Morris of her now 8- and 4-year olds. “We wanted to stay with the t-shirt theme so we contacted a charitable organization Cole was familiar with to okay the idea of donating shirts and then sent out invitations asking that instead of gifts, guests bring a shirt to give to a needy child.”
Cole’s celebration was a full-blown festivity with thirty pint-sized partakers and a variety of art and craft stations including tie-dying t-shirts, clay sculpting and wooden toy painting. Cole experienced an outpouring of offerings too. “We got tons of shirts — stacks! People brought outfits too!” says Elisa. “After the party we went to the agency and together handed the shirts over. The representative thanked him, took his picture to include in an upcoming newsletter and said, ‘Maybe when other people see your photo they’ll want to have parties like yours.’ I looked at Cole and his face was beaming. That’s when I knew he got it. He really got it!”
Both parents agree the no-gift notion didn’t detract from the celebrations. It broadened their childrens’ community awareness and stirred up a sense of gratitude. “I think the whole event benefited Cole in that he enjoyed being with the people he loves, doing what he loves, which is arts and crafts. And that’s what’s really important,” says Elisa. “He also learned an important lesson about giving and developed a greater appreciation for others’ needs. And he had a great time in the process.”
The event left an indelible impression on Cayden too. “He learned that he’s fortunate to have family and friends who love him, good health and a comfortable lifestyle,” says Tracy. “And that helping others is our responsibility, and with a little creativity it can be a fun and rewarding experience.”
Denise Yearian is the former editor of two parenting magazines and the mother of three children.
Things to consider when hosting a children’s charitable birthday party:
1. Proceed with permission. Before your child’s birthday, ask if he would like to have a charitable party. Move ahead with party plans only if your child is in total agreement then keep him central to all aspects of the planning and celebration.
2. Explore the options. There are several ways to host a charitable party: ask guests to participate in the charitable giving process, either by monetary means or by donating a specific type of gift; create a charitable project at the party to be donated, such as stuffing teddy bears; or opt out of party frills and make a personal contribution.
3. Choose a charity. Talk with your child about the kind of non-profit organization he would like to work with. Find an institution that taps into his interests — animals, art, literature, etc. Or adopt an underprivileged family with children the same age as your child.
4. Contact and confirm. Contact the organization and ask what type of donation (monetary or other) is needed.
5. Invite and inform. If you choose to have guests participate in the gift-giving process, include a note with the invitation explaining your effort. If specific items are needed, make suggestions.
6. Go the extra mile. Create a party theme with activities your child will enjoy. Focus on friendships and having fun.7. Deliver the goods. Once the party is over include your child in the final gift-giving transaction. Take his picture with the donated items and have him go along to deliver them. If you are giving to a specific family, encourage your child to write a note letting the recipient know he was glad to help.
8. Offer accolades. Give your child praise for sharing his birthday.
9. Live it out. Set an ongoing example by integrating giving into your family’s lifestyle throughout the year.
